Musings from the artful doula

A DOULA IS THANKFUL..........

2011-11-23T11:28:00.000-08:00

As the end of another year of attending women approaches, I can't help but reflect on the blessings in my life as a birth attendant. It would be easy to become distracted by the many obstacles that rolled in my path this year.....the arrest of my midwife, a divide in the doula/midwife community, the fight for the rights of women that sometimes seems an enormous mountain to climb. But in anyone's life, if you look close enough, you can see the blessings. I want to express my thankfulness for some of those here:

1. I am thankful for women who want to be informed. It isn't easy to read all the books and sift through the plethora of information on the internet to try to find the truth. These women print articles, study statistics and relentlessly pursue truth all for the benefit of the baby that they carry into this world. It isn't easy to make a decision about birth that makes your family gasp, shake their heads and murmur about you behind your back. It is hard to be the lone woman in a playgroup who doesn't make the same birth decisions as the majority. It's hard to stand for something that will inevitably cause you more pain and work than anything else in your life. But they do it....and they do it well. I am blessed to know them and serve them.

2. I am thankful for Dr. Susan Roque, Certified Nurse Midwife Marcia Ensminger, and Certified Nurse Midwife Nicole Winecoff. These women stand in the face of those who would run them out of town daily and they fight for the rights of women birthing in the hospital. They also provide an out of hospital option, The Natural Beginnings Birth Center, for women who may not be ready for a homebirth, but also don't want the trappings of the hospital experience. For those going to the hospital, they offer respect and an ear that listens to a woman's wishes. They do not strive to be in control or to manipulate a woman into doing what is easiest for them. They do not make decisions based on the possibility of a lawsuit that could wipe out their possessions and career. Despite being harassed by hospital administrators, unnecessarily investigated by fellow doctors with cesarean rates 4 times their own(who should be investigated?), they stand and serve the women who seek them wanting something better......something different for themselves and their babies. They challenge their peers with a cesarean rate of 17% in the face of others having rates over 40% and show them that it can be done. However, their lives would be less stressful and easier all around if they just gave in and played the game like the others. However, empowered birth is a cause that burns in their souls and for them to do that would be to compromise their calling and their convictions. I wish everyone knew how hard it is to stand for something so sacred in the midst of the billionaire boys club of doctors who would rather see you crash and burn.

3. I am thankful for my family. They wait for me to come home. They remain quiet so that I can catch up on my sleep. They ask about the women I birth with. They care about each one. My tween son likes to keep track of how many boys and girls are born from month to month. My four year old says that birth is fun. My husband turns off the movie we just got into with grace and understanding as I run out the door. He sleeps alone many nights and patiently keeps the fires burning at home in my absence. My mother will scramble to pick up my children so that I can reach a mother whose poor husband is calling me saying, "Please, come quick!" and she will pray fervently for the mother having a long and difficult labor. Without all of them, I would not be able to provide the care that I do.

4. I am thankful for my mentors. The midwives and women who have taught me everything I know are my superheroes. My midwife has taught me well and the other midwives that surround me have shaped and fashioned me into the birth professional that I have become. They have taught me respect for labor, compassion for mothers and the importance of a baby's first moments. They risk their freedom daily for the cause of a woman's right to birth where she desires and with who she desires. They give a woman a sip of water, hold her crying toddler while charting a blood pressure, clean a bathroom after a laboring mom vomits all over it and comfort a woman after a miscarriage. They don't have an answering service and they do make house calls. The compensation they receive is minuscule and they sacrifice their own needs to wait for a client's tax return or a father to find a new job so that the financial pressures won't put added stress on the family.

5. I am thankful for medical intervention. When it is truly needed, it is lifesaving and invaluable. When a mother develops a complication or when baby is not well, our system and technology can provide life saving therapies and support that can give moms and babies a good outcome and hope for a future.

6. I am thankful for doulas who live to serve women. These women sacrifice so much.....going into the hospital and helping women to navigate what can quickly become an island of chaos and intervention. When doulas function in their calling, they spread encouragement and hope to everyone they touch. They put a woman's needs above their own agendas or philosophies even when it is difficult. And they support the birth community....helping to make it a stronger and more united place......always promoting the needs of women and babies.

7. I am thankful for our legislatures whose names are here http://www.ncleg.net/gascripts/members/memberList.pl?sChamber=House and here http://www.ncleg.net/gascripts/members/memberList.pl?sChamber=Senate who I believe will do the right thing for women in 2012 and license CPMs to help provide a safer homebirth community in NC. I believe that they will look at the facts and recognize that homebirth is increasing, despite our antiquated laws, and that they will bring them up to date. It's hard to institute change and it comes with a lot of blood, sweat and tears, but it is crucial to becoming a stronger state and reducing our infant and maternal mortality.

8. I am thankful for North Carolina Friends of Midwives. www.ncfom.com If you have not joined, please do. They need your help now more than ever. They need your dollars...plain and simple. The work they do provides no financial compensation but costs more than you could imagine. If you ever intend to have a baby in NC, then their work affects the experience that you will have. The advocacy that they provide improves the birth environment overall for all women and they do not take this lightly.

9. I am thankful for the moms who function in my birth community. They are incredible. When someone loses their husband, they rally together and buy grocery gift cards and other needed things. When someone has a baby in June and their air conditioning malfunctions, they put their resources together and provide for her. The see a need, and they respond. When a midwife is arrested, women pledge support and resources to help her, whether she delivered their baby or not. These women exude love and understanding. They unite for a common cause despite their individual differences. They bring their nursing babies and sleepy toddlers on a three hour trip to demonstrate to their local government that they expect to be heard and counted. They bless me. When I have lost my faith in man, they remind me that there is not only hope, but abundant support always waiting in the wings.

Sometimes it is overwhelming to look around and see everything that God is doing in my life. I know that this good work will continue. It has to. Giving in to the mainstream isn't an option because too many people stand to be harmed.

So on this Thanksgiving, I will reflect on these and other wonderful blessings and remember that despite a flailing economy, an oppressed birth climate and a shameful infant mortality rate in NC, I am personally abundantly blessed by those around me. I am surrounded by people who care and who stand ready to provide something better........one woman at a time.

Does God care how I feed my baby?

2011-10-24T15:15:00.000-07:00

I am not a confrontational person....really....I'm not. When my food isn't cooked exactly like I ordered it, I would rather just eat it than complain about it. My husband is good about speaking for me when I'm too chicken to speak for myself. Even as a birth professional, I don't give information unless it is solicited. The older I get, the less I enjoy those hard conversations.

On the day I saw the flyer, I didn't really envision a hard conversation. I was at a church where I had attended in the past as a single mother. The church had been very loving and supportive to me and had always been doctrinally sound in all of their teachings. So when I saw the flyer for Growing Kids God's Way classes forming, I took one of the tear off tabs. I wondered if, being a smaller church, they were aware of the current recommendations about feeding infants and how vastly different those were from the current recommendations from physicians, midwives and lactation professionals. I called the number and left a message.

I got a call back but missed it. A very sweet woman left a message for me. She was very excited that I was interested in classes. I began thinking that maybe my information wouldn't be welcome and honestly, just ignored the message and didn't return the call. I didn't want any uncomfortable conversation. I mean, it's the responsibility of each Christian to weigh what any man says against the Word of God, which is our final authority(2 Timothy 2:15).

But she called again. I was in the car and tired and I admittedly should have rescheduled the conversation. But God knows me better than I know myself and knows I probably would have put it off again in an effort to avoid a potentially difficult conversation. I told her I was a local birth professional and asked her if the curriculum she was teaching still taught from the Babywise book that encouraged a feeding schedule and the goal of having a baby sleeping through the night by 12 weeks. The answer was yes. I also asked if she was aware of the current documentation about infant feeding and how scheduled feedings were against all the current research as well as potentially dangerous.

I admit that I had an expectation. I really thought that regardless of how she felt, I would be asked to send some information and told that it would be looked at and that I may never hear from anyone again, but at least I would know that I had shared the truth. Instead, I was immedately met with defense for the Ezzos and their curriculum. There was no concern about the medical evidence....only that of the Ezzos. I was, however, asked to provide a scripture that proved that demand feeding was Biblical. Since I am not teaching something called "Growing Kids GOD'S Way", I really feel like the burden of proof on proving something to be God's way should be on those teaching something that is labeled GOD'S WAY! However, in order to possibly help one person who may read this and have second thoughts about using this method of feeding/sleep training for a baby, I will do my best.

Let's start with MY experience. I am a believer. By that, I mean I believe that Jesus died on the cross to save our sins and that if you believe in Him and put your faith in trust in Him as Lord of your life, then you are "saved." I believe that the body of Christ consists of ALL believers collectively, not individual churches and that we are all a family in Christ. It seemed to be a concern during one part of the conversation that I was not a member of this particular church that was holding the class. I am not, but I am a member of the body/bride of Christ.

In 1997 I gave birth to my second child. It was a failed induction that ended in a cesarean. The recovery was painful and hard. I also had a child who had a tight frenulum or a "tongue tie" and this made for some issues of great pain with nursing. Once the tongue issue was resolved, things were better, but by then my baby had become somewhat fussy and I was not getting any sleep. Combined with being in a strained marriage, already having a 7 year old and still feeling the effects of my surgery on my body, I was discouraged and exhausted. So when I walked in to my church bookstore that evening(which was 13 years ago and no longer where I attend church) and I saw on the cover, "SLEEPING THROUGH THE NIGHT BY 8 WEEKS" I thought I must be dreaming. I would have paid $100 for the book that day. I was so tired. I bought it immediately and read it during church instead of listening to the sermon. I felt desperate. Of course, I now know that this is a normal part of mothering a newborn, but at the time, I wasn't aware of that. I began the program immediately. It was hard to implement the feeding schedule. I mean, my baby seemed hungry more often than the book said he should. In the books defense, it did say if your baby is hungry, feed him. But being in the state of mind I was, which as a birth professional I find most women end up in at some point, I was too scared to be flexible. I wanted to sleep. I wanted it to work. I wanted to follow it to the letter so it would work. The book was confusing. Sometimes it would speak to flexibility, but then it would talk about those demand feeding people who let their babies rule their lives and ruin their marriages. I wanted two things: 1. I wanted to sleep. 2. I wanted to please God. I fed my baby on a schedule....I let him cry so he could learn to fall asleep on his own and not be allowed to manipulate me. When he would cry I would feel like it was wrong, but again.....sleep and pleasing God. This was God's way. And it worked. My baby began sleeping 5-6 hours just like the book said and barely cried anymore because if they are content and happy, they have no reason to cry. I was a good mom. I was sleeping. But most of all, I was pleasing God.

As my baby grew, he developed some odd habits in his play. He would spin incessantly in his exersaucer. He crawled and walked late. He was not saying anything. He resisted being held and acted uncomfortable with snuggles and kisses. By age three, my child was diagnosed on the autism spectrum. This was in 2000 and autism was just beginning to be understood but was not the household word it is today. I was told that this was typical behavior of autistic kids to resist touch and affection and not to take it personally. HOpefully through therapy , he would learn to appreciate hugs and kisses again.

I was devastated. All those nights my baby cried for me to hold him and nurse him to sleep and I had let him cry. Now my baby didn't want to be held and I had wasted the little bit of time when he craved affection and touch. I would never be able to get those days and moments back and the days going forward would be a challenge. Suddenly, God's way seemed very uncharacteristic of God.

Please understand, I don't believe that Babywise had anything to do with my child having autism. This was an inherited condition. But there was a window of time with his condition where I could have given him that love and affection, but instead, I chose to train him to eat and sleep. When he finally quit crying and I thought I had succeeded and produced a happy baby thanks to Babywise, what I was really seeing was the haunting effects of autism creeping in. In fact, as a toddler, he hardly cried at all and still to this day has trouble with understanding sadness and reacting appropriately to it. But at the time, I mistook it for the wonderful results of being a Babywise baby which were sleeping through the night, content to play on their own and eating on the schedule.

I have to take responsibility for my actions. I began to question and realize that Ezzo's teachings, while they seemed logical, were not Biblical. However, this was being taught as God's way....not parenting tips for the Christian household.....God's way.

I am not the first person to question Babywise. Dr.James Dobson felt compelled to release a statement about it. Click HERE for that statement. In fact, I began to find out that Gary Ezzo and his wife had serious questions looming over them about their character and integrity. Those things have been condensed HERE.

I grew up in the church. I know that pastors and teachers are held to a higher standard of accountability by God. This is why I struggle to understand how church leaders can endorse and encourage a doctrine that claims to be God's design when it is written by a pastor who does not fit the Biblical criteria.

1 Timothy 3:1-7 It is a trustworthy statement: if any man aspires to the office of overseer, it is a fine work he desires to do. An overseer, then, must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, temperate, prudent, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not addicted to wine or pugnacious, but gentle, uncontentious, free from the love of money. He must be one who manages his own household well, keeping his children under control with all dignity (but if a man does not know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of the church of God?); and not a new convert, lest he become conceited and fall into the condemnation incurred by the devil. And he must have a good reputation with those outside the church, so that he may not fall into reproach and the snare of the devil. (NAS)

Titus 1:7-11 For the overseer must be above reproach as God's steward, not self-willed, not quick-tempered, not addicted to wine, not pugnacious, not fond of sordid gain, but hospitable, loving what is good, sensible, just, devout, self-controlled, holding fast the faithful word which is in accordance with the teaching, that he may be able both to exhort in sound doctrine and to refute those who contradict. For there are many rebellious men, empty talkers and deceivers, especially those of the circumcision, who must be silenced because they are upsetting whole families, teaching things they should not teach for the sake of sordid gain. (NAS)

Even if only a small portion of the accuasations against Gary Ezzo are true, he has clearly violated the scriptures as one whose teachings should be considered sound.

So is demand feeding Biblical? Do the Scriptures have anything to say about the nursing relationship. Thankfully, yes.

1 Peter 2:2-3 Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, now that you have tasted that the Lord is good.

I find it interesting....the word CRAVE. So apparently, it is a given that newborn babies, by God's very design, will crave the breast. In the same way, we are to crave spiritual growth. Is God saying that we should desire this growth only at certain times? I think not. It seems that we should be craving it night and day, just like a baby craves food.

Isaiah 66: 11 For you will nurse and be satisfied
at her comforting breasts;
you will drink deeply
and delight in her overflowing abundance.”
12 For this is what the LORD says:
“I will extend peace to her like a river,
and the wealth of nations like a flooding stream;
you will nurse and be carried on her arm
and dangled on her knees.
13 As a mother comforts her child,
so will I comfort you;
and you will be comforted over Jerusalem.”

Here the prophet speaks the Word of the Lord and again, uses the nursing relationsihp as a metaphor for God's own comfort given to his chilren. We also see here the assumption that the nursing relationship is about so much more than nutrition. It is a spiritual experience. Is there any indication here that God regulates this comfort? It there any indication that it should be received on a schedule? No, it is overflowing and abundant and drinking deeply is recommended. There is no concern here for metabolism or gluttony. To reduce breastfeeding to just a feeding issue is, it seems, blasphemous.

1 Thessalonians 2: 7-9 Just as a nursing mother cares for her children, so we cared for you. Because we loved you so much, we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well. Surely you remember, brothers and sisters, our toil and hardship; we worked night and day in order not to be a burden to anyone while we preached the gospel of God to you.

Once again, we see a parallel to the nursing relationship. But here, we see the Bible speak to the work and effort that it is. Did the ministers here seek their own needs? Did they worry about their needs for sleep and relationships. No, in fact, they displayed the equivalent of the nursing relationship as ministry. Could it be that nursing/feeding our babies is an act of ministering to our children? Would we regiment this? No, we would work day and night, just as they did.

Lamentations 4: 3-4
Even jackals offer their breasts
to nurse their young,
but my people have become heartless
like ostriches in the desert.
Because of thirst the infant’s tongue
sticks to the roof of its mouth;
the children beg for bread,
but no one gives it to them.

Interesting here that an animals nursing behavior is brought up. If we look at animals and the way they nurse their young, night nursing is paramount. It is the time when the mother is still and they are usually in a protected place. Could it be that even though we are above the animals, that theirs and our instincts for eating and feeding are the same?

It appears to me that the Bible makes plenty of parallels to nursing and our very own relationship to God. It is a way that we can learn to comprehend the unconditional, deep and overflowing love of God and to make it about scheduled feeding is concerning. Churches need to ask themselves:

1. Is the church qualified to teach women how to feed their babies especially when that feeding pattern is discouraged and contraindicated by the American Academy of Pediatrics, the World Health Organization, the Le Leche League and many other medical/lactation professionals who specialize in the care of mothers and babies?

2. Is the church following the the Biblical standards for teachers and pastors by encouraging the work of the Ezzos?

3. Does the church teach a balance and properly explain the relationship that the Bible makes to breastfeeding and our relationship to Christ?

4. Is the church prepared to support and be accountable for any negative issues that may arise in the health of a baby from their teaching of this curriculum?

5. Has it been proven scripturally that this curriculum truly is God's way for feeding a baby?

If I am wrong, may God bring swift correction to me.

But in my work with women and babies, I see daily how motherhood was so perfectly and intricately designed by God. A I watch the process of birth, unadulterated and uninterrupted, I see the results of "being knit together in my mothers womb" and how God has truly created a process that works. Babies are born knowing what they need and they are given their cries to express those needs and ask for comfort. Who are we to interfere with that process? Who is Gary Ezzo to change God's design? I don't believe it needs any improvement and when I stand before the Lord, I don't want to have to answer for trying to do that.

Let me way, I also realize that not everyone is physically able to nurse. I don't always know why these things happen. We live in a broken world where our bodies do not sometimes function the way we would like them to. Thankfully, it isn't often, but I have watched mothers try everything under the sun to help a low milk supply or severe latch issues. I have watched babies struggle to gain weight despite being nursed around the clock. I know that God extends the same spiritual benefits to the bottle feeding relationship when it becomes necessary for a babies to be healthy. Bottle feeding/supplementation can be done with the same closeness as nursing when it is the option that becomes necessary. Holding, loving, babywearing and keeping babies close to our bodies also provides that closeness when nursing is not physically possible.

In the end, do unto others as you would have them do to you. When you are old and unable to feed yourself and possibly unable to communicate with words, do you want your hunger ignored? Do you want your life regimented to 3 meals a day and sleeping all night. Or do you want someone to respond to you when you are hungry regardless of how long it has been since you last ate? Do you want someone to come to you in the night if you feel fear or loneliness and offer you comfort? Why do we think babies want anything any different?

United we stand??????

2011-08-19T17:27:00.000-07:00

The past two years have been a whirlwind for me. As I complete my paperwork for NARM I am filled with excitement, anticipation and bone chilling fear! Ok, maybe I exaggerate. But the thoughts of failing a national exam that I'm not even sure how I'm going to pay for on the first round, coupled with the possibility of working in a state where the rules for CPM's are oppressive and antequated is no small burden. However, I know my Lord has never called me to a task that He has not equipped me to complete and that any work HE has begun in me, HE has always seen through to the end. Still, I am human, and I fear and fail and fumble.

I began this journey in the birth world after my own harried birth experiences, as many birth professionals do. In the beginning I really felt like the birth community as a whole was one big happy family and I pictured lots of midwives and doulas in long skirts holding hands and swaying in song all for the cause of women and birthing. I quickly found out that birth professionals were people too. Birthy women can be catty and mean just like anyone else. Our opinions differ.....she shouldn't do this, she should have done that, I would NEVER do that and the list goes on. I realized a dream of beginning an organization for birth professionals, only to watch it crumble before me at the hands of disagreement and misunderstanding. I must admit to feeling a bit disillusioned. Through that whole process, I found myself caught up in judging a sister, being rejected by friends, and having to make difficult choices. Thankfully, that person that I judged forgave me and we are now great friends and she is one of my mentors. The others, well, it's a long story that has become mundane. But........I grew and found myself respected for my principles.

At the MANA conference recently, I was surrounded by birthy women, midwives...doulas....lactation consultants....apprentices........all of different inclinations and philosophies about birth. Lisa Goldstein will just tell you....I mean just tell.............. you all about it. Some of us fall in the floor laughing at her, and some have to go and detox after listening to her use the work d**k so many times in one sentence. LOL Anne Frye is a calm, cool and collected feminist who I struggle to ever see in a long crinkly skirt, regardless of how many times I had pictured her that way as I read her books. My team, Bethlehem Birthing Services, has our own sense of diversity. We have a criminal(LOL)......no, really, we have a rally for the causer, a co-conspirator/lifter upper, a petite, passionate fireball, a punk rock photgrapher, a type A planner/ponderer, a just love, laugh and move forwarder, and a up and coming speller/service shiner. Then there is me, the alpha female go getter who can turn it off when I need to but God help us all if it gets turned on full blast..............er. I admit that I struggle sometimes to find my way amidst women who can be so varied and different than myself. It challenges me in sometimes painful ways. It also brings me a joy that is unspeakable. It teaches me......I learn.

And I learned that birth people are just like anyone else. That we have our own opinions and issues and sometimes we disagree. But earlier this year, I learned something more. ......something that made my weekend at MANA a little more blessed.

This past February, after watching a baby struggle and my midwife taken away in handcuffs, I learned that when the chips are down.....none of that matters. I learned that the real and genuine women in this midwifery/birth community will surround you, comfort you and fight with you. I will never forget coming to my facebook wall and seeing a little heart with a word beside it, "sister", from a midwife who I knew but had never even met in person. I wept. And it strengthened me. I have never even met some of my facebook friends, but they came to my page with words of support and encouragement. "Keep fighting" "I'm praying for you!" "You are stronger than you know" ....and I wasn't even the one in shackles.

Of course, there were still some on the fringe who wanted to discourage and stir up dissent even in the midst of an opportunity to educate and encourage. . But they were all identified and dismissed as those of us with bigger hearts and hands got on with the business of fighting for a woman's right to choose her birth attendant, her birth place and her birth story. I believe those women will grieve those actions one day, but I can be thankful that they only caused us to come together and fight harder. We marched strong, we made our voices heard, and we awoke to find ourselves surrounded by the women we had helped in pregnancy and birth marching and voicing with us. When it really matters, and when a cause is close to the hearts of people, the voices of the negative can always be pushed into the background.

At the MANA conference, my team was in charge of closing ceremonies. In our skit, I got to "rebirth"(thanks so much, Karen Strange!) and have a baby in the middle of the room. On that very day, 4 years earlier, I had given birth to the baby that God used to solidify the calling on my life. It only took minutes(unlike the 24 hours it took me to birth the REAL baby Jude) to birth this baby, and I thankfully avoided the back labor, but I quickly heard the applause of everyone as my friends handed me my dollbaby after a mere 5 seconds of pushing. LOL Then we all stood, held hands, and sang............just like I had envisioned years ago when I began this journey. In that moment, we were one.

Sure, we all still have our individual beliefs and opinions. We will inevitably still look at each other from time to time and say, "I would never have done that!", but this only means that we remain human and imperfect. However, I know that as we move forward in NC for the rights of women, those things will fade into the background and we will shine through as a united voice.

Just a couple of days after I returned, I helped to welcome a baby girl into the world whose mom had been through a painful loss just acouple of years earlier. I had walked with her through that loss and it was a first for me in my career as a birth professional and it marked my heart in ways I will never forget. But as this baby entered the world, I was reminded that though weeping may endure for a night, joy comes in the morning. There is truly a rainbow after the storm. And that women who let their hands follow their heart will be there when another sister needs them. You see, they know they are CALLED to a purpose. And that is all that matters.

So I gather my paperwork, knowing so many sister midwives have walked this road and are cheering me on. I pray that I will make them all proud....even the ones who don't know me. Because we are our sister's keeper in the world of birth. When one is attacked, everyone feels it. When one is victorious, everyone rejoices. It's just how we roll.

Matt Maher, Hold Us Together

It don't have a job, don't pay your bills

Won't buy you a home in Beverly Hills

Won't fix your life in five easy steps

Ain't the law of the land or the government?

But it's all you need

And love will hold us together

Make us a shelter to weather the storm

And I'll be my brother's keeper

So the whole world would know that we're not alone

It's waiting for you knocking at your door

In the moment of truth when your heart hits the floor

And you're on your knees

And love will hold us together

Make us a shelter to weather the storm

And I'll be my brother's keeper

So the whole world would know that we're not alone

This is the first day of the rest of your life

This is the first day of the rest of your life

'Cause even in the dark you can still see the light

It's gonna be alright, it's gonna be alright

This is the first day of the rest of your life

This is the first day of the rest of your life

'Cause even in the dark you can still see the light

It's gonna be alright, it's gonna be alright

Love will hold us together

Make us a shelter to weather the storm

And I'll be my brother's keeper

So the whole world would know that we're not alone

What a "NO" vote means to you, North Carolina women.......

2011-06-04T06:47:00.000-07:00

This coming week, the legislative committee in Raleigh will vote on whether or not the state should develop a licensing process for Certified Professional Midwives. This process will cost the state nothing....yes, you read correctly, FREE! The cost will be absorbed by the midwives applying for the license. Not only does it not cost the state, but the normalization of home birth will in all probability save our state money. In this time of tragic economics, why would our representatives vote against something that is win-win for NC? I think you should ask them.

I know what some who are unfamiliar with home birth and the skill level of Certified Professional Midwives are thinking. Have babies at home? What? Isn't that dangerous? What if there is an emergency? I don't blame you for asking these questions. If the only thing you know about home birth is from reading the paper, then you are probably horrified. Articles devoid of fact and chock full of ignorant opinion are rampant. Haywood Brown is one of those writers and he demonstrates his editorial ability in this article: http://heraldsun.com/view/full_story/13326332/article-N-C--should-not-li

The fact is that the safety of home birth has been proven. This makes some people fuming mad. Many obstetricians are offended at the thought that anyone besides one of their own could deliver a healthy baby to a healthy mother. They choose to believe the untruths that suit their purposes and ramble on about unskilled attendants and the "what ifs" as if a home birth midwife walks into a birth with some boiled water and a prayer. The truth is that most obstetricians have no idea what the education of a Certified Professional Midwife entails. They haven't the first clue at the professionalism and precision with which a home birth with a CPM is handled. I have heard comments from physicians and other hospital staff such as, "Oh, so they(CPM's) are certified in neonatal resuscitation?" or "Oh, so they do carry instruments." This is an insult to birthing women...that their physicians would offer such opinions on something they know so little about.

But understand that not all physicians feel that way. Here locally, Dr. Henry Dorn of High Point, NC, believes in the skill of midwives and the right of the woman to choose her place of birth. Read about his views here: http://www.theunnecesarean.com/blog/2010/12/10/an-alternative-obgyn-birth-plan.html
Of course, doctors like him don't support these choices without paying a price. As a doula, I watch other physicians blackball and bully these doctors...refusing to support them if they are ever sued and causing attitudes of tension and indignation between the nurses in the hospitals where they practice.

A vote of "no" in the legislative committee will support this behavior. It will support the notion that women are a species to be controlled and managed. It will support the ideology that pregnant women are too ignorant to educate themselves about pregnancy and birth and need to be led rather than have an active voice in their care. It will say that the practice of liability based medical decisions and interventions should continue whether or not it is best for the patient. It doesn't matter that it costs our state money and lives(check out NC's maternal and infant mortality). It doesn't matter that our cesarean rate is more than double the the World Health Organization's recommended 15%.

Many of my clients....and I do mean MANY....are currently driving over 45 miles to seek out the care that they want for their pregnancy and birth. Many are willing to take their dollars into our bordering states that have realized their value and they are birthing there.

Yet doctors still claim that mothers and babies will start dying all around us if CPM's are legalized. Yet, none of them can explain why this is not happening in Virginia, South Carolina and Tennessee where CPM's practice legally. None of them can explain why North Carolina's maternal and infant mortality are not improving. None of them can explain why babies and mothers still die in the hospital where all of the life saving equipment that they claim is absolutely necessary is available and at an arms reach. A vote of "no" will say to NC women that your only choice is the hospital where they are not achieving the same standard that they are setting for midwives, but that is ok because they have "MD" behind their name.

Yes, mothers and babies die or are injured during birth. It doesn't happen often, but it does happen. Many times, it is beyond the control of any person, machine or intervention. Life happens....death happens. This will always be. A vote of "yes" or "no" will never change that.

But a vote of "no" will say that our system doesn't need to change or improve. It will say that what we have now is satisfactory even though statistics show that NC is not anywhere near the safest place in the US to give birth. It will say to all women, whether they birth at home or the hospital, that it is just not worth raising the standard for you. Because you see, the availability of a more appealing form of care will force doctors to change their ways if they want to keep their business. They may actually have to admit that pregnancy is not a disease and that women are valuable and smart enough in our society to be informed and have a say in their pregnancy and birth. What a radical concept.

I have attended over 100 births as a doula. No matter what anyone says, I see first hand how all of this plays out in both hospital and home. Women who want normal birth have few options that are stress free and don't involve arguing and being scolded by your physician. And little by little, women are beginning to question.....to study.....to empower themselves and realize that they are capable of normal birth. They see through the lies of people like out of work physician, Dr. Amy Tuteur who not only decries natural birth, but taunts and insults the women who want it. Mothers are realizing that this is contributing to the devaluing of women in our society and they refuse that for themselves and for their own daughters. On a local level, we listen to the angry rants of people like Tara Servatius, formerly of WBT talk radio, who are beyond accepting fact and seem to enjoy spewing fiction to the public just to make this group of women who would choose empowered birth look selfish and reckless. Women read Haywood Brown's opinion and realize that he and others like him have no desire to see them be treated better or to be kept safer. Their desires are rooted in their own egos and agendas. A vote of "no" supports those egos and agendas and says that the value of women is expendable.

Lastly, a vote of "no" says to North Carolina women that your voice is small and unimportant. North Carolina women have driven hours with children in tow to stand on the lawn en masse in Raleigh. They write, they call, they carry signs. They have rallied. They are not asking for the right to birth at home. This IS their right. They are simply asking for the access to an accountable, licensed professional to be there to help facilitate a safe birth.

Will NC say no to safety? Will NC say that it does not value its women? Will NC say that the rich physicians of the medical society and ACOG are the only people qualified to facilitate birth in NC? Will NC FORCE all women into the hospitals where they are not making the grade?

Next week, when the committee votes....these questions will be answered with a very simple "yes" or "no." So pay attention, NC women. Your worth is about to be determined.

Why did I do it?????

2011-03-30T08:46:00.000-07:00

This week on my Facebook page I posted about an experience I had with a client who wanted to have a vaginal birth after two previous cesareans(VBA2C). My client was bullied by a doctor who was on staff, but not her personal physician. She was lectured like a child and told that because of her refusal to submit to a third cesarean, all women who desired a VBAC at Lake Norman Regional Hospital were now in danger of losing that opportunity. It was an ugly scene that shocked and saddened me. It haunted me. Throughout the day I kept hearing the tone of Dr. Grant Miller's voice. I kept seeing the expression on his face along with his defensive body language. The words he had spoken caused a painful ringing in my ears.

He is not the first to have this attitude and he certainly won't be the last. But it was such an extreme experience for me as a doula having attended almost 100 births in my career, that I could not help but write about it and make others aware. Believe me, I knew what I was in for. While some would be fully supportive, I knew there would be some who would oppose what I had done.

So why did I do it? Simple. Because I need to be able to sleep at night. To sweep that situation under the rug and move on was not an option for me. I believe in the women I support. I believe in birth. That is why I work in this field.

I was that woman not too long ago. My second child was born by cesarean after a failed induction for a big baby(who ended up being 7lbs 7oz). My body simply wasn't ready to have a baby. I lamented this for years. Now, I know what many would say. I should just have been happy to have a healthy baby. I should have focused less on how the baby got here and focused more on the fact that he was here. Yes, I heard all those things. I still hear those things said to my clients at times. Do people have any idea how much it hurts to hear that your deepest desires and feelings are selfish and invalid? Do you think that all those years I didn't LONG to be at peace with my birth? Let me tell you that I DID. I wanted more than anything to be able to just move past it and let it go. But I couldn't. It isn't natural for a woman not to care about such things. The pain of being separated from my baby in those first few hours because of side effects from my anesthesia was devastating. Those moments were critical. I can never get them back! How dare anyone suggest that I am selfish for wishing I had made different decisions or that things had happened differently. My VBAC 10 years later was one of the most healing experiences in my life. I felt redeemed and renewed. Many doctors and even some nurses think that is ridiculous.......that it shouldn't matter that much. That such emotions should not be tied to the birth process. I am here to tell you that they are and that it is completely normal and natural. To feel differently would require me to turn off a part of myself that is crucial to birthing and mothering....my instincts.

As a doula, I never really know what to expect. Some doctors and nurses welcome my presence and see me as an asset to the patient experience. Some roll their eyes at me and see me as some kind of natural birth nazi who tortures women for the sake of unmedicated birth. Some are in the middle and wait to decide whether they like me or not by how compliant my client is to their wishes. I only have so much control over their perceptions of me.

However, it was ingrained in my being the moment I accepted the calling to go into the birth field that I would advocate for these women.

I realize the risks. I knew when I wrote the note that I could receive some backlash. I knew it would cost me. If approached by anyone for doula services who lists Lake Norman Ob/Gyn as their provider, I will have to refer them on to another doula for their own sake. I will have to let them know that my presence amongst their doctors could actually hurt them more than help them. If money were my concern, I certainly would have remained quietly oppositional.

I also realize that there is a time and a place for medical intervention. I do not believe that every single woman should have a baby at home with a midwife. I do not believe that every woman should have an unmedicated birth. I do not believe that every cesarean is unecessary. Medical intervention can be very necessary and lifesaving and is needed when complications arise. I am thankful that hospitals and obstetrician/surgeons are available when these needs arise. I am also unopposed to women who want medical interventions. If they have made an informed decision to have an epidural for pain or to have a medically unecessary induction, then I support that.

And let me be clear - I am not saying that Dr. Miller is a bad doctor. I saw comments defending what he did.....testimonies from women he has helped. They adore him enough to excuse his bad behavior and that is most certainly their perogative to do so. But in my world, being good to a million women doesn't excuse violating one.

I am not calling for a crucifixion of Dr. Miller, or a lynching at Lake Norman. I am simply wanting them to be aware of their consumers opinions. Yes, the patients are the consumers. They pay for the services they receive. Their voices deserve to be heard. We cannot allow birthing women to be violated. There are respectful ways to approach someone when hospital policy does not support what they want. Interpersonal skills can be learned by anyone and are very useful in professional dealings and should be used when dealing with sensitive situations. But above all, when a patient has been informed of risks, benefits and rules and they still don't want to be cut open, there needs to be a place of respect for that. No one expected Dr. Miller's blessing in that moment, but we did expect the situation to be handled respectfully and in a way that upholds the dignity of the patient. This is a MINIMAL standard to uphold.

Women who desire an intervention free birth are not just crunchy granolas who want to light incense and drum the baby out. It isn't about having a candlelit experience with Gregorian Chanting in the background. Our desires are for our lives and the health of our babies. Our desires go deep to our core and are rooted in intelligence and research. We have not dismissed the value of medicine, but we have not deified it either. We are well aware that more women die in childbirth right now than should and that the reason for this is the amount of cesareans that happen every day in this country. We want obstetrical care to be women centered instead of liabilty centered or physician centered. For those who want the epidural and a martini when they walk in the door, we say let them. But for those who do not, we say, RESPECT THEM!

The plea of the woman desiring natural birth in the hospital.....

2011-02-11T12:34:00.000-08:00

Dear Doctor, L&D nurse and other hospital personel.....

Thank you for taking care of me during my labor and delivery. I wanted to communicate this information to you before I enter your establishment so that you may better serve me while I am there. All the signs on the walls say that this hospital's top concern is patient safety AND satisfaction. I am trusting that you as an individual are concerned about that also.

I have been pregnant for 9 long months. I am excited, scared and overwhelmed all at the same time. When I come in the door, please take that into consideration. I realize that I may be the fourth person you've taken care of today, but I really want a good relationship with you from the start.

This may be my first baby. I may have had a traumatic birth experience in the past. I could be a high need personality or extremely laid back. Either way, I will want your help and your support. I realize that when I come in, it is your job to get me through the admissions process which involves multiple questions. Please don't be upset if I wave at you to give me a moment or if my answers are short and curt. I am trying to work with my body and focus on my labor. I cannot possibly remember when I had my last tetanus shot, but I realize you have to ask and I will do my best to answer you when I can breathe. I will try to sign the forms, but I may have questions and they may just have to wait.

I want an natural birth. You may read my birth plan and chalk me up to one of the many women who come in saying this and end up getting the epidural anyway. I may be that woman, but please give me the benefit of the doubt. My desires for birth are extremely important. I don't get to do this day over.

I realize that there are medications available for pain and they are given to women all the time. I know that you see women use them frequently without issue, but I have researched the risks and the benefits and have determined that I will not use them unless the benefit outweighs the risk at that particular time. Do not assume I am trying to be a hero or trying to prove something to myself or others. I have deep convictions about why feeling the pain is worth it for myself and for my baby. If this is not a decision you made for yourself at your own birth, don't assume that you understand my mindset. I don't expect you to. I only ask that you respect what I am doing and be supportive.

I realize that every decision that is made affects my memory of this experience forever. I also realize that each intervention I agree to could and probably will lead to another. I will not take any decision lightly so please don't be offended when I ask for time to talk to my birth team or to just take in the information that I have been given. I am very aware that birth is unpredictable and that unexpected things can and do happen. I am open to changes in my birth plan. All I ask is that you present my options to me as the consumer and decision-maker. I do not want to be told what I am allowed to do and not allowed to do. At the end of the day, I will be paying the bill for this experience so just as you would not walk into a room full of your superiors and present them with your plan for their day, please don't do that to me. If you present my options to me in the spirit of informed consent, there should be no communication issues, and I am more likely to trust your judgement.

I do care about the health of myself and my baby. I would never want to jeopardize either. So when you come in to tell me that one or the other looks to be compromised, please be ready to present me with some data. Don't assume that I am being non-compliant when I question your recommendations. Simply explain to me clearly what the risks of the situation are and give me evidence based facts.

Speaking of evidence based, please don't act like I am a hippy earth mother just because I want to do things that ARE evidence based such as delayed cord clamping, eating and drinking freely while in labor, pushing in a position other than on my back, intermittent(not constant) fetal monitoring, no separation of mother and baby and skin to skin contact immediately. I realize you see a lot of tragic things, but unless there is a reason to assume my pregnancy and labor is not normal, I am assuming it is. Please support me in that. If you don't believe in evidence based practices, be ready to explain to me why that is. I have a right to know.

I may have some other members of my birth team besides my husband/partner. I may have a doula. I realize all doulas are different. You may have had a negative experience with one. But this is my birth and it is my right to have her there. I ask that you treat her with respect and if there is any issue with her behavior, please discuss that with me as I am paying for her services the same as I am paying for yours. Don't assume that my decisions have been influenced by her. The mere fact that I hired her should be a clue that I am a person who has done more than the average amount of research about birth. Since births where doulas are present have been shown to have better outcomes for mothers, I would think you would be completely on board. To my nurse, I have asked her to talk me out of pain medication. She has seen multiple women labor and knows that at some point I will probably ask for it. Do not assume she is torturing me. She and I have formed a relationship over the course of my pregnancy and I trust her. I have just met you and you do not know my deepest desires for this day. But she does. Please work together with her as part of MY team.

Lastly, if my birth plan changes and I end up with an intervention or a situation that I clearly did not want, acknowledge my disappointment. Validate my grief. Do not try to make me feel better by pointing out that I am safe and healthy and so is my baby. Of course, I am thankful for that. But my experience was important too, and it is normal to feel some grief over the loss of the birth I had hoped for. If you would just be sensitive to my feelings and support my process, then I will work through it much easier. Your acknowledgement of my disappointment will help me feel like I did all the right things and that you truly cared about my desires. I will be less likely to question myself and question my care providers if they do not dismiss my concerns. I may need to talk about the moments that my plan took a turn. I may need more details after the fact. Please give me that information. It is helpful to me as I move forward into motherhood. It helps me transition and adjust to the unpredictable role of "mom". I will feel more confident when you treat me with the utmost respect.

Thank you for hearing me. I hope that my birth will be everything I want it to be. I hope that you want that for me. I am on a journey, and you have been asked to come alongside me. Wherever that journey leads, I hope that we all walk away with a sense of satisfaction and of course, a healthy mom and baby.

Reviving yourself......and your blog.....

2010-12-29T06:35:00.000-08:00

My blogging skills have gone into hibernation and I will once again attempt to revive them for the upcoming year. My time seems to be swept away by births, phone calls and the constant studying that I must to in order to sit for my midwifery exam in 2011. Oh, and did I mention being a wife and mother too? However, writing has always been a passion of mine and it is so important never to let those things you are passionate about get lost in your responsibilities.

So, my other thoughts for the new year.......be a voice for birthing women. This year I would like to be involved in some activities that bring awareness to the importance of a woman's birth experience. I am thinking, perhaps, of collaborating with some other birth professionals to hold some community activities that would accomplish this. Stay tuned for more on that!

I will begin teaching prenatal yoga on a regular basis in January at Charlotte Family Yoga Center. I am very excited about this. Yoga is an excellent way to learn to listen to and work with your body. These are important skills for the laboring woman to have regardless of whether she intends to utilize pain medication, or have an unmedicated birth. Yoga helps with the common discomforts of pregnancy as well by strengthening the lower back, the pelvic floor, the shoulders and other areas of the body that typcially ache and ail while we are pregnant. I am excited about teaching yoga again and sharing this wonderful form of exercise with expecting moms.

Twenty eleven is looking to be an awesome year. I will be watching quite a few women whom I have already assisted deliver again! I can't believe I've been doing this long enough for that to be happening. It is so exciting and such an honor! I'm looking forward with anticipation and curiosity. Life is good. MY life is awesome!

The Nuances of Dilation....

2010-01-24T11:13:00.001-08:00

On my local mommy message board, there is much talk about dilation and effacement. Around here, doctors start checking you at 36 weeks. Why? Who knows. The information is not beneficial to anyone from what I can see. It seems to only serve to make the mom anxious.

There are women who actually believe that they have "undilated"....meaning they were told they were a certain number of cm's, and then at the next visit told they were less. So just for my own peace of mind, I explain the art of checking dilation from my perspective.

When I first began checking dilation, one of my mentor midwives showed me how to get a good feel for the cervix, then withdraw your fingers and actually check on a tape measure to see how many centimeters it was. Now this is still tricky as you must visualize in your head how far apart your fingers are since you can't see them. And you can't withdraw your two fingers and keep them apart as that would be uncomfortable for the mother. So you can get my drift here that this is NOT an exact science.

Now, when a cervix is almost closed, or one fingertip....that is usually 1cm. But as you get into 2-7cm....it is very tricky. And everyone is a little different. Sometimes a practitioner will stretch the cervix a bit and be generous with their cm's, whereas my midwife wants to know the dilation without any stretching. So if you are checked by two people, one who interprets with a stretch and one who doesn't, you may get two very different results. Also, since perception plays such a big role, this can cause discrepancy between two different cervical exams. My vision in my head of how far apart my fingers are may be innacurate by a cm or so. This is why I always call a cervix about 1cm less that what I think it really is. I would rather underestimat than over...then have a devastated mom if someone else checks and she has appeared to "go backwards."

There is usually no question at 8, 9, and 10cm as these are not hard to assess. But no one ever thinks to ask their nurse how long they have been checking cervixes. You may have the newest nurse on the L&D floor and she may not have really gotten adept at cervical checks yet. She has to feel as insecure as I did those first few times. And out of those first few times, I was off a bit according to my midwife.

It is an art....not a science. And just when I think I have mastered it after a year of working in the birth biz, I will check a cervix that makes me go, "huh?" becuase it is so puzzling.

So the fact is, if your doctor or nurse says you're 8, 9 or 10cm..do the happy dance and get ready to push out a baby. If its somewhere between 2 and 7...take it with a grain of salt, keep breathing and know that the baby will come. And those routine checks at the dr's office.....a simple no thank you will keep you from letting those numbers transform in your brain to crazy thoughts such as, "This baby is never going to come!" or "I'm 3cm, I will go into labor tonight!" only to go another week.

2009-12-14T18:55:00.000-08:00

Will informed consent become extinct???

Recently I attended a birth where the doctor told my client that studies have proven that women and babies have better outcomes when we "manage" labor. He cited "the Ireland Study" which at the time I had never heard of. There was a good reason for that. It was done before I was born. I am 38. That's been a while. I can't think of many studies that were done that many years ago that still hold water today.

Here is what we do know. Our cesarean rate as a nation is at an all time high - curently 31.8% as of 2007. This was a 48% rise from 1996. In 1970, the national cesarean rate was 6%. See date from fellow blogger:

With stats like that, how dare a doctor reference an outdated study to try to convince my client that she needs pitocin so that she will have her baby faster. Those statistics are a frightening look at what managing labor can do.

Most women never question what their doctor suggests. Many women go their entire lives thinking that they would have never gone into labor if they hadn't been induced because they were induced with all of their children at 41 weeks. One thing that statistically we do know....no one stays pregnant forever. Many women believe that it's a good thing that they had that cesarean for failure to progress because when the baby was born, he/she had a cord wrapped around their neck (maybe even twice). Cords are gently unwrapped from around baby's necks(during homebirths)the majority of the time, I would say. It is not an uncommon occurence.

Women are believing a lie that they are powerless in their birth process. They are being taught by providers that listening to their instincts is reckless and instead, they should completely trust the information from their doctor. Little do they know that it is the insurance companies that have more control over a doctors decisions and protocols. Dr's are threatened on a daily basis with unseen increase in their malpractice insurance if they don't follow the game plan. As long as no harm is done right?? Well, no visible harm. Sometimes, the harm of a interventive labor is to the woman's psychological well being. But hey, most lawsuits for that aren't successful, so it's as good of a risk as any. The doctor's malpractice insurance remains affordable.....and women everwhere don't understand why they feel they lost control of their whole experience? Informing and empowering????? I think not.

Enlightenment continues......

2009-12-02T19:42:00.000-08:00

My current reading for my midwifery study unit is Easing Labor Pain by Adrienne Leiberman. I must say, the first few chapters were dry as a bone. Granted, I do have an older edition and some of the information is dated, but still dry nonetheless. However, as you get past the 4th or 5th chapter, I found the book to be very informative. Here are some excerpts I found important:

In Chapter 6, titled "You are what you eat", I found wonderful nutritional advice. For instance, Adelle Davis, a respected nutritionist, recommends calcium supplementation at the beginning of labor. The premise is that calcium eases muscle cramps....thereby making uterine contractions less painful, but not less effective. This is not studied and documented, but I find it to be logical. And besides, what can it hurt to take a little extra calcium when your contractions get going. So have a tall glass of whole milk and take a nice cal-mag supplement at the get go and see what happens!

In chapter 17, "Hospital Routines: Is the pain worth the gain?", Lieberman writes,
"Each form of intervention carries with it certain risks, which are worth accepting in high risk situations where the benefits may outweigh the drawbacks. However, in low-risk situations, advantages of intervention frequently do not exist. Then these interventions only add risk and discomfort wihtout providing any compensatory benefits."

I wish I could help every woman embrace this concept. All of the things that you are subjected to at the hospital - for the good of you and your baby - have not been proven to make your outcome better. Unless your risk level during pregnancy warrants constant monitoring, routine IV fluids or other things, they really aren't necessary. And my next point explains why this is.

Quote from the same chapter: "By 1985, indeed two thirds of this country's obstetricians had been sued for malpractice at least once. This medicolegal climate makes an obstetrician much more likely to intervene in the birth process. As one obstetrician said, 'I've never heard of a doctor being sued for doing a cesarean, but lots of doctors have been sued for not doing one.'"

This is the crux of the matter. Many of the things that women believe are just part of a safe and healthy pregnancy are simply tools to put on paper to thwart a lawsuit. We don't want to believe that. Birth is beautiful....babies are cute....doctors who deliver them are pro woman and baby, right? Doctors must practice defensively in a country that allows them to be put out of a career over one lawsuit. How do they know that you aren't the one who will end their career? It's better to strap you with the fetal monitor and make you uncomfortable enough to scream for the epidural rather than not have it on and take that 2% chance that something will happen to your baby unknowingly.

Women must educate themselves on the true facts and figures regarding all of these interventions. Know what really makes you safe. The safest thing for you and your baby during labor(as long as you have no major medical complications) is to be up and walking around - moving. Do this at home. The longer you are at the hospital, the more likely you are to become uncomfortable enough to need the epidural. As soon as you get that first intervention and become immobile, then the baby runs the risk of struggling to adapt. If that happens, you will find yourself in the operating room.

Easing Labor Pain is worth the read for the mom who wants to be informed. THe book is not anti-hospital or anti-doctor. It is not going to tell you that you should just have a homebirth(but I might...LOL). It is very conservative, yet factual. There is also some wonderful information on methods of relaxation and labor coping strategies.

Want an empowering hopspital birth? Know your stuff. Find a provider you can trust. Hire a doula. Trust in your body. Keep moving. Push in a position that feels natural. Make your wishes clear. Make sure anyone present at your birth is completely onboard with your philosophies. Don't run through the doors after your first contraction. And finally.....remember that your body and your baby know the drill. Just relax and respond.

Morning Sickness.....a new perspective.

2009-11-17T14:47:00.000-08:00

I got this from a fellow midwife in training. I cannot attest to its effectiveness, but from what I remember about morning sickness, anything is worth a try.

Morning Sickness

You can beat this. The cause and cure for morning sickness has been shrouded in mystery for a long time. But it is really not that difficult to understand, neither is it that difficult to conquer. Most medical texts say the cause is either hormonal or unknown. The standard answer of eating several small meals per day, or coating the gastrointestinal tract with crackers or fruit, is usually not effective. Even worse is the recommendation to take vitamin B6. This usually exacerbates the morning sickness, not abates it. Also, I think most of you understand this already, but I think I should mention it anyway: you do not have feel nauseous only in the morning to have morning sickness. The nauseous feeling can come at anytime of the day or night.

A powerful ally with a sidekick
When a woman becomes pregnant certain hormones are produced in large amounts. One of these hormones is the hCG hormone (Human chorionic gonadotropin) . This hormone is primarily responsible for maintaining the pregnancy. The measurement of this hormone is the most common diagnostic tool to confirm conception. Non-pregnant women will not have significant levels of hCG, in fact oftentimes it cannot be detected at all. The hCG hormone will keep a woman from spontaneously aborting (miscarrying) the newly conceived child. However, these high levels of hCG precipitate a response from the liver. The liver is stimulated to produce larger amounts of a digestive enzyme called bile. The hCG hormone is our powerful ally, working to maintain the pregnancy. The bile, whose release is stimulated by the hCG hormone, is the sidekick that causes the morning sickness. The encouraging news is that the more nauseous you feel, the less likely you will miscarry.

Why bile makes us feel nauseous
Bile is a digestive enzyme designed to break down the fatty acids that we eat. When we have no fatty acids in our duodenum (the first part of the small intestine and what most people commonly call the stomach), there is nothing to digest but YOU! This causes us to feel nauseous. We will feel queasiness in the center of our upper abdomen, right under the sternum (the small bony extension where the front rib cage joins together) and above the belly button (umbilical cord site). But eating fats is not the answer Oh ho! You must be thinking now that if you put fatty acids into your digestive tract that this will solve the problem. It seems to make sense that if the bile is meant to digest fatty acids, all we need to do is give the bile the fatty acids it wants to digest. Then the bile will not bother our intestinal lining making us feel nauseous. But, when we eat foods with fats in them, it actually causes a further release of bile. Now we have the original bile making us feel queasy PLUS a new onslaught of this same nauseous-causing substance. Then there is more to the bile story. Bile is also the carrier of expended hormones. Because the liver is responsible for filtering fat soluble substances from the bloodstream, hormones (which are fat soluble) are collected by the liver. The liver has the job of expelling from the body these expended hormones. The only exit out of the body that the liver has available to it is the bile. Bile will leave the liver, travel to the gall bladder, continue its journey to the duodenum, thread its way through the rest of the small intestine and then the large intestine. Finally it will be expelled out of the body through a bowel movement.

Well, that is the design of our Creator, but when we eat the way of the Western world, this plan can be thwarted. Before I explain that, I need to impress upon you this fact: the more hormones that are filtered out of the bloodstream by the liver, the more bile the liver will release for the purpose of disposing these hormones. When more bile is released, the probability of nausea increases drastically. How the Western diet affects bile In the West, we generally eat very high fat diets. The more fat we eat, the more we stimulate the liver to release bile in order to break down these fats. However, bile itself is a fat, and not all of the bile fats will exit the body. In fact, a large amount of the bile will be reabsorbed and recycled to the liver. The problem with the bile recycling is that these bile fats carry much debris. This debris has been filtered out of the bloodstream and put in the bile fat carriers to be escorted out of the body. But if the bile recycles, so does the debris that is carried in the bile fat. This means that there is more debris to be discarded in the next release of bile. The repeated recycling of the same bile creates a very nasty debris-laden bile that will make us feel even more nauseated. Bile’s good buddy I mentioned above how the Western high fat diet contributes to an elevated bile roduction. But even more significant is the lack of soluble fiber in the Western diet. If we Westerners would eat soluble fiber in ample amounts, we could eat all the fat we wanted and never suffer adverse effects.

Soluble fiber is found in legumes (there are other sources but they are so minimally endowed with soluble fiber that it is not worth mentioning them for the cure of morning sickness). Legumes are pinto beans, kidney beans, garbanzo beans (also known as chick peas), black-eyed peas, lentils, black beans, red beans, navy beans, white beans, great northern beans, crowder peas (also known as field peas), yellow-eyed beans, and the list goes on. They are also termed soup beans. Most Westerners will admit that it is not often that we eat beans, if ever. These beans are dense with soluble fiber. Soluble fiber and bile (or any fatty acid) have a great affinity toward one another. In fact, they will bind so tightly together that they cannot be parted. As no fiber (soluble or insoluble) can cross the intestinal barrier, all the bile that has been bound together with the soluble fiber will exit
the body through a bowel movement. That means the bile will not recycle. That means the bile will not grow nasty with accumulating debris. That means you will feel less nauseous.

Less nauseous? Could I feel no nausea?
Yes, it is possible for you to feel no nausea from the blessing of increased hCG levels. I say blessing because the increased hCG means that you will most likely have a full term pregnancy. Eliminating the nausea does not decrease the production of the hCG hormone, but it just negates the hCG side effect of nausea.

The answer
I think you already know. The answer is to eat legumes. Now you must know to what extent you must eat legumes. If you are feeling nauseous, you must immediately consume your beans. You will need to eat at least 1/4 cup of cooked legumes. If you can eat more, it is even better. You will see relief in under 20 minutes. The nausea will go away. However, the nausea will be back in a period of time. That period of time is dependent upon the liver’s stimulation to produce more bile. If the hCG hormone is at high levels, it wonâ€™ be long (1-4 hours) before you are feeling that queasy feeling again. Then what? You eat your beans again. And so you go. You eat beans every time you have that nauseous feeling. If that means you are spending the majority of your time at the table with a bowl of beans in front of you, so be it! It will only be for a short period of time. As the bile is carried out of your body, the successive releases of bile become less potent with debris. After the consumption of legumes, each release of bile is less nauseating. Eventually (within a few days) you will not have to hang your head over a pile of beans all day. In fact, you will be able to consume beans just once or twice in the day to prevent the morning sickness from reoccurring.

Are there any side effects to eating legumes?
None, except the possibility of flatulence (commonly known as gas). However, if the gas is not causing you physical discomfort, continue on the legumes. The gas eventually will go away as the digestive system begins to produce the enzymes necessary to break down the beans. If you have gas to the extent that it causes you pain (not social pain, but physical pain), decrease your intake of beans at one setting. Instead of eating the 1/4 cup plus, eat a few teaspoons. Then gradually increase your intake until you can eat ample amount of the legumes. I would like to point out though that the majority of women who are experiencing morning sickness will not have much trouble with gas with the addition of legumes to their diet. There is so much bile present, the beans never really have a chance to become gas-producing.

Do not be fooled by simplicity
The answer to morning sickness, as you can see, is not that difficult. I urge you to try the solution. Do not fall into the trap of thinking that this is too simple of an answer. I am always amazed at how difficult we make things. Truly, we, as a medical community, have the tendency to turn mole-hills into mountains. Ladies, eat your beans! You will be surprised and grateful at how your pregnancy will become wonderful.

Pregnant woman = Doormat?????

2009-10-21T14:34:00.000-07:00

Sometimes the birth climate in the US saddens me. You know, there was a day and time when doctors told women that reading was bad for their health. They said that all the sitting and strain on the eyes was taxing on their bodies. In reality, it was an effort to stop women from becoming informed.

But this is 2009 and we have come a long way, baby.....or have we? The sign above would suggest we have not. This is an actual sign that appears in the Aspen Women's center in Provo, Utah.

It has been shown in many studies that doulas improve outcomes for mothers, not harm them. Yes, I am aware that there are a few doulas out there who argue with doctors, contradict them in front of their patients and come across as arrogant in the birth room. There are heavy handed people in every profession. But the majority of doulas are there for the mother.

The Bradley Method of childbirth is simply a matter of choice. For some couples, Bradley classes have made them able to face labor without fear and anxiety. Bradley is getting picked on, in my opinion. THere aren't too many childbirth education "brands" in the US currently that would agree that our current state of obstetrical care is stellar.

This is about rights. On the side of the doc, kudos for at least being honest and posting publicly in your office that you have no intention of allowing women to choose the care options that they feel are best for them personally. No one can say they weren't warned. But in googling this office, for every woman who rallied against this policy, there was another who raved about their care at this office. I also found out that one doctor in the practice proudly uses forceps in all of his vaginal deliveries claiming it makes birth easier for the mother. I think even most of his fellow OB's would disagree with that. See this link for the facts: http://www.efn.org/~djz/birth/betterbirth/7bottom.html#fore

Regrettably, here in Charlotte, I have come across this attitude among individual doctors and entire practices. The difference is that they tell their patients something very different. They vow their support and encouragement to the mother who seeks a natural birth experience.....until she goes past 40 weeks, or her fluid levels are slightly low, or her measurements are 1-2cm beyond her dates or the most popular by far....the ultrasound shows a BIG baby. See information about true reasons for induction and intervention here: http://www.lamaze.org/ChildbirthEducators/ResourcesforEducators/CarePracticePapers/LaborBeginsOnItsOwn/tabid/487/Default.aspx

If you are a woman seeking a natural birth experience, the responsibility has to be yours to educate yourself about your rights as well as the facts regarding medical protocols. I have seen too many women who had very strong resolve compromise when faced with scare tactics and inaccurate information. And steer clear of doctors who seem at all uncomfortable with your having a doula or tells you what childbirth education curriculum you should/should not use. This is an individual decision. And by all means....run from any doctor who refuses to accept a birth plan. YOU are the consumer. YOU pay the bill. The decision is YOURS.

So much for the textbook......

2009-09-10T14:05:00.000-07:00

Labor is different for every woman, but occasionally, someone really breaks the mold. With permission, I share the story of my client, S.

S is a strong, energetic young woman having her first baby. She and her husband quickly became dear to my heart. Upon her labor beginning, like a good girl, she went for a beautiful walk in the park with her hubby, and called me when the contractions became a little closer. I told her that by listening to her, I did think she was in early labor and that she would be having her baby soon(meaning in the next couple of days). This went on all day. I went to an early morning birth, then had to take my toddler to the doctor, and decided to run over and check on her. She was frustrated. The contractions had been going on all day with no apparent change.

By the time I arrived, there were no clues that she was in active labor. Many times, contractions will slow down or even stop when I show up...then they pick up again. She would casually mention that she was having a contraction between our topics of conversation. With a loving smirk, I told her husband to call me when she stopped talking so much, that we would know then that it was time to get really serious. I also gave her some homeopathics just to see if it would help. After about an hour....I left thinking it would be a while.

I got home and took a much needed hot bath. The baby born that day had pulled me out of bed at 5am. I had also been at a birth the day before that...LOL. I was hoping for a few hours of sleep. But S's husband called me back before my hair was even dry. He said she had not stopped talking....rather...she had begun yelling and cursing and had droppped to her hands and knees on the floor. I told him to ask her what she felt like we needed to do....mamma instincts know. She said we should go to the hospital and out the door I went to meet them there.

Upon arriving, she was still chatty. She did stop talking for a contraction, but I did not see the seriousness and the concentration that I normally see in active labor. Usually, toward delivery, mom will stop talking even in between contractions....other than to say, "water" or "bathroom" or "hurts here." She and hubby didn't even bring the bags in out of the car because they had convinced themselves on the way to the hospital that this might not even be real labor. LOL Imagine all of our surprise when the nurse announced that she was 9cm.

There are always exceptions to the rule and she was one. But, it proves that mamma instincts will always tell you the right thing to do. It was time to go - even though she wasn't exhibiting the textbook signs. And by the way, she never did get quiet and contemplative. She never stopped cracking jokes and smiling. She made it look easy. And she made me stop looking so hard for absolutes.......

ACOG gets a big surprise.....

2009-09-01T13:31:00.000-07:00

This is what happens when women speak up for their rights to the birth they want. I love it!

Issued: August 31, 2009

Viral Internet Campaign Exposes Bogus Research on the "Problem" of Increased Demand for Midwife Care

If you have difficulty viewing this message, please visit the PushNewsroom.

Thousands of Activists Nationwide Force Physician Group to Scrub Its Website

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

WASHINGTON, D.C. (August 31, 2009) – In under 18 hours, a viral internet campaign targeted at the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) forced the group to take down a public plea asking its members to submit anecdotal, anonymous data about patients who planned out-of-hospital deliveries. According to the request, which was originally linked from ACOG's home page, the professional trade association for OB/GYNs is "concerned" about the "problem" of growing numbers of women seeking out-of-hospital maternity care.

"Just follow the money," said Steff Hedenkamp of The Big Push for Midwives Campaign. "ACOG does not want to continue losing patients to Certified Professional Midwives and out-of-hospital birth, so they're telling members to send in more of the same old tall tales that far too many OBs love to scare women with. Well, we have news for ACOG8
0it's not working."

The campaign to expose the physician group's plans began on Facebook and Twitter and rapidly drew thousands of women to ACOG's website, where they submitted their own data about their healthy deliveries in private homes and in freestanding birth centers throughout the country. In response, ACOG moved quickly to scrub its website and placed its request for unsourced data from members behind a password-protected firewall.

"This was almost as fun as last year's campaign pressuring the American Medical Association to back off from its ridiculous claim that Ricki Lake is responsible for the increase in out-of-hospital deliveries," said Sabrina McIntyre, mother of two. "The AMA and ACOG seem to forget that women are capable of making rational, informed decisions about our maternity care providers and birth settings. We don't appreciate fear-mongering tactics meant to try and scare us away from using safe and cost-effective, community-based alternatives to our current maternity care system."

Analysts familiar with ACOG expect the group to use the anecdotal data collected from members to support its ongoing state and federal lobbying campaigns aimed at denying women access to out-of-hospital maternity care and Certified Professional Midwives, who are specially trained to provide it. "ACOG admits in its own documents that they've been forced to use 'hardball tactics' against women who are advocating for choices in maternity care," said Hedenkamp. "Frankly, this latest stunt of theirs to troll for 'fresh' folklore reek
s of desperation. "

The Big Push for Midwives Campaign represents thousands of grassroots advocates in the United States who support expanding access to Certified Professional Midwives and out-of-hospital maternity care. The mission of The Big Push includes educating national policymakers about the reduced costs and improved outcomes associated with out-of-hospital birth and advocating for including the services of Certified Professional Midwives in health care reform. Media inquiries: Katherine Prown (414) 550-8025, katie@thebigpushfor midwives. org

###

The Big Push for Midwives Campaign | 2300 M Street, N.W., Suite 800
Washington, D.C. 20037-1434 | TheBigPushforMidwiv es.org

The wonder of it all........

2009-07-28T15:05:00.000-07:00

I believe birth really is more art than science. If you gather a group of 25 women and ask them what a contraction feels like, you will get 25 different explanations. If you ask them about their birth experience, you will get 25 very different impressions.

I think what is missing today in modern obstetrics is the recognition that women want a birth experience. Some women want an unmedicated birth and some want the epidural when they walk through the door, but they all want their experience to be miraculous and sacred. Sometimes a woman doesn't even realize how important this is to her until she has a birth that is less than satisfying.

A woman in labor is a masterpiece. Left to her own, she will usually find her "groove". I love the moment when a woman finds that. At a recent birth I attended, I walked in to hear mom singing a song about Greek letters and such. I later found out this was her sorority song. When the contractions were difficult, her "groove" was to sing that song and it worked to move her through the process. Another client quietly rocked and chanted, "Good things are happening down there" over and over again. It is beautiful. It is art. Mom is painting her birth experience. We need to respect her canvas.....her space. Let her create.

Labor calls a woman to reach deep within herself and be completely strong and completely vulnerable all at the same time. When a woman's labor stalls for a bit and technology is rushed to her side to "make things happen", then we diminish her work. We, in essence, tell her that what she is doing just isn't enough. Her masterpiece doesn't meet the expectations.

Pregnancy is not a disease and labor is not a condition to be managed. It is a process.....a journey. As long as we continue to "manage" birth instead of allowing a life to enter the world in the same miraculous way that it is created, then women will continue to feel dissatisfied with themselves and their birth. They may not be able to tell you exactly why they feel this "void", after all, they have a healthy baby and that's the goal....right? We must recognize that it is so much more than that. It is an image, a work of art, that will linger in a woman's mind for the rest of her life. She will look at it many times. She will attempt to interpret it. She will ask others to look at it and give their opinion. She will either see it as her most beautiful work, or she will consider it to be lacking.

What is a doula?

2009-07-14T15:45:00.000-07:00

I get this question all the time. It's a funny word, really(prounouced doo-luh). This is quoted from the DONA website(www.dona.org):

The word "doula" comes from the ancient Greek meaning "a woman who serves" and is now used to refer to a trained and experienced professional who provides continuous physical, emotional and informational support to the mother before, during and just after birth; or who provides emotional and practical support during the postpartum period.

People ask me, "Do you deliver the baby?" I say, "No, I'm just along for the ride." It sounds trite, but really I am.

Mom is on a journey that she has been traveling for 9 months. She has read books, she has talked to countless friends who have explained their births in detail(for better or worse)and she has poured over her gift registry trying to decide which of the 300 stroller models is the safest, best and cutest. She is driving this ride!!!

Along comes labor. It starts slow and builds. Mom and dad call me. I come over and watch mom's demeanor. I give her a reassuring smile every time she looks at me so that she will know she is doing everything right. I chat with dad, assure him that he is going to do fine also. And we all let the process unfold. I step in with a suggestion or a back rub if needed. Sometimes I remind mom to breathe or to relax. I reassure mom and dad at each stage that what she is feeling is normal and that she can do this. I provide a constant presence so dad can update family, grab a bite to eat, or just go to the bathroom! I help parents navigate the decisions about interventions and procedures so that they feel they can make informed decisions. And, of course, I fetch ice and sprite and coffee for dad at 2am and all those "practical" things.

At the end of the day, my goal is not that my clients feel they couldn't have done it without me. Rather, I hope they feel like THEY did it, and I just made the ride a little easier.

Chirpractic Care During Pregnancy

2009-07-06T08:19:00.000-07:00

This was an article posted by a chiropractor from Asheville, NC who was a speaker at my doula training. I know and trust a local chiropractor, www.beyondwellnesscc.com , for my clients and friends. Check it out!

Chiropractic Care in Pregnancy

One of the most exciting times in a woman’s life is when she finds out that she is expecting a baby. Chiropractic care during pregnancy can be a valuable addition to a Mom’s prenatal care. A properly functioning spine and nervous system is an important part of a wellness pregnancy. In addition to the noticeable changes your pregnancy will cause your body, pregnancy can cause subtle changes in the musculoskeletal system—changes your Chiropractor is able to detect and correct.

The position of your growing baby will cause your center of gravity to shift, and your spine will naturally alter itself to accommodate this change. As a result, you may experience low back and pelvic pain. The increase in hormones during pregnancy can also cause ligaments, cartilage, and even bones to soften and become more pliable. Pelvic bones may even become displaced or fixated. Since your hips will need to spread to accommodate the delivery of your baby, fixated pelvic bones can lead to complications during delivery.

A bone or vertebra that is slightly out-of-place can create nerve irritation, which can and will interfere with your body’s communication system. By using special or modified techniques during your pregnancy, your Family Wellness Chiropractor can restore the function of your nervous system, improve your overall wellness, and increase your comfort during your pregnancy and delivery.
In fact, research has shown that:

84% of pregnant women treated by Chiropractors received profound relief from low back pain

Women who received Chiropractic care had nearly a 25% reduction in the average labor time and a 33% reduction for women carrying multiples

Postpartum pain was relieved in 90 of 120 moms that had been under regular Chiropractic care

During your pregnancy, your Doctor of Chiropractic can do the following:

Correct vertebral misalignment and relieve nerve interference with gentle adjustments.
Help ensure that pelvic bones are properly aligned, contributing to a shorter and easier delivery.
Re-establish the natural position and mobility of the joints.
Provide freedom from interference of normal nerve energy.
Decrease the likelihood of your fetus being in the wrong position during the last trimester.

Many Mothers have come to understand the vital role that Chiropractic care plays in a healthy pregnancy. The benefits of a Chiropractic adjustment offer more than just low back pain relief. The spinal adjustments have also helped them feel healthier during the pregnancy, decreased morning sickness, facilitated in shorter labor and delivery times, and increased overall sense of well being. Dr. Alisha Davis is dedicated to providing you with the absolute best in family wellness care. So take a moment today to discuss any concerns you may have regarding a wellness pregnancy and delivery and learn about the many benefits of Chiropractic care for you and your baby.

Dr. Alisha Davis, DC, DACCP

Are you an ungrateful patient? Ask the AMA!

2009-06-18T04:58:00.000-07:00

AMA Resolution Would Seek to Label “Ungrateful” Patients

Redondo Beach, CA, June 11, 2009 - At the American Medical Association’s (AMA) Annual Meeting next week, delegates will vote on a resolution which proposes to develop CPT (billing) codes to identify and label “non-compliant” patients (1)

The resolution complains:

“The stress of dealing with ungrateful patients is adding to the stress of physicians leading to decreased physician satisfaction.”

“This resolution is alarming in its arrogance and its failure to recognize, or even pay lip service to, patient autonomy,” said Desirre Andrews, the newly elected president of the International Cesarean Awareness Network (ICAN).

If approved, the resolution could hold implications for women receiving maternity care. For pregnant women seeking quality care and good outcomes, “non-compliance” is often their only alternative to accepting sub-standard care. Physicians routinely order interventions like induction, episiotomy, or cesarean section unnecessarily.

Liz Dutzy, a mother from Olathe, Kansas, delivered her first two babies by cesarean and was told by her obstetrician that she needed another surgical delivery. “My doctor told me that I needed to have a cesarean delivery at 39 weeks, or my uterus would rupture and my baby would die.” She sought out another care provider and had a healthy and safe intervention-free {home} birth at 41 weeks and 3 days gestation.

A recent report by Childbirth Connection and The Milbank Memorial Fund, called “Evidence-Based Maternity Care: What It Is and What It Can Achieve ,” (2) shows that the state of maternity care in the U.S. is worrisome, driven largely by a failure of care providers to heed evidence-based care practices. For most women in the U.S., care practices that have been proven to make childbirth easier and safer are underused, and interventions that may increase risks to mothers and babies are routinely overused. The authors of the report point to the “perinatal paradox” of doing more, but accomplishing less.

The resolution proposed by the Michigan delegation of the AMA could threaten patient care and patient autonomy for several reasons:

• Billing codes that would categorize any disagreement and exercise of autonomy on the part of the patient as “non-compliance” “abuse” or “hostility” could create a pathway for insurance companies to deny coverage to patients

• Use of these labels fails to recognize patients as competent partners with physicians in their own care

• Tagging patients as “non-compliant” fails to recognize that there is not a “one size fits all” approach to care, that different opinions among physicians abound, and that patients are entitled to these very same differences of opinion

• Labeling patients as “non-compliant” may, in fact, be punitive, jeopardizing a patient’s ability to seek out other care providers

The resolution also fails to address how it would implicate patients navigating controversial issues in medical care, like vaginal birth after cesarean (VBAC). While a substantive body of medical research demonstrates that VBAC is reasonably safe, if not safer, than repeat cesareans, most physicians and hospitals refuse to support VBAC. (3) The language in the resolution suggests that patients who assert their right to opt for VBAC could be tagged as non-compliant, even though their choice would be consistent with the medical research.

“The reality is that the balance of power in the physician-patient relationship is decidedly tipped towards physicians. The least patients should have is the right to disagree with their doctors and not be labeled a ‘naughty’ patient,” said Andrews.

About Cesareans: When a cesarean is medically necessary, it can be a lifesaving technique for both mother and baby, and worth the risks involved. Potential risks to babies from cesareans include: low birth weight, prematurity, respiratory problems, and lacerations. Potential risks to women include: hemorrhage, infection, hysterectomy, surgical mistakes, re-hospitalization, dangerous placental abnormalities in future pregnancies, unexplained stillbirth in future pregnancies and increased percentage of maternal death.

Mission statement: ICAN is a nonprofit organization whose mission is to improve maternal-child health by preventing unnecessary cesareans through education, providing support for cesarean recovery and promoting vaginal birth after cesarean. ICAN has 110 chapters in North America and Europe, which hold educational and support meetings for people interested in cesarean prevention and recovery.

(1) Resolution 710 “Identifying Abusive, Hostile or Non-Compliant Patients”
(2) Evidence-Based Maternity Care: What It Is and What It Can Achieve
(3) http://www.ican-online.org/ican-in-the-news/trouble-repeat-cesareans

If you don't like the idea of being officially labeled "non-compliant" or "ungrateful" for questioning your physician, then go to http://www.ama-assn.org/ama/pub/about-ama/our-people/the-federation-medicine/state-medical-society-websites.shtml , click on the link for your state AMA and contact them. Let them know that this proposal is unacceptable. Voting is next week.

Are you really overdue?

2009-06-08T04:51:00.000-07:00

It is becoming routine for doctors to induce patients at 41.5 weeks in this area. Inductions have not increased favorable outcomes for women in the US. Is is possibly because 41.5 weeks isn't really 41.5 weeks? Read this article before you accept that you are "overdue."

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/1047180/the_lie_of_the_edd_why_your_due_date.html

Meliea's recommended reading.........

2009-03-04T15:42:00.000-08:00

I am often asked what books I would recommend for expecting and/or new moms. I thought this would be a great place to put my reading list!

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin

*This book is filled with beautiful birth stories. I have gleaned many tips for helping with different issues in labor from this book. I also like the chapter on episiotomy.

The Complete Guide to Pregnancy and Childbirth by Sheila Kitzinger

* All of her books are incredible but this one has very factual and statistical information to make moms to be feel more confident when talking to their doctors about electronic fetal monitoring, induction of labor for a postdate pregnancy, ultrasound technology and many other common issues that come up at dr. visits. There are also WONDERFUL photographs of positions for labor and the developing pregnancy. I carry this book in my birth bag.

The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth by Henci Goer

* This book is exactly what the title implies. It empowers moms to be to think carefully about all options and make informed decisions.

Birthing From Within

* This is a wonderful book for everyone, but especially for the mom who has had a traumatic physical event in her life(abuse, surgery, etc) or a previous traumatic or unsatisfying birth experience.

Gentle Birth Choices

* This book usually comes with a DVD with BEAUTIFUL births on it. Contains a lot of facts and figures as well as encouragement and comfort.

The Happiest Baby on the Block

* Read this BEFORE the baby comes and save yourself MUCH grief! This book helps parents understand their baby's behavior and learn to cope in positive ways. Also gives the famous 5 things to soothe your crying baby! This book helped me finally get my baby to nap.....two words....white noise!

The Vaccine Book by Dr. Sears(the son)

*Middle of the road, not to one extreme or the other facts and information about vaccines. Each vaccine is reviewed individually for it's purpose, side effects, efficacy, necessity and so forth. There is also a recommended alternative schedule for parent's who want to vaccinate, but not in keeping with the current guidlines.

The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley

*For mom's like me who couldn't have done the cry it out thing if you had paid me. Great information on all aspects of sleeping. This book saved my sanity....for real..... Again, recommended reading BEFORE the baby comes!

Feel the love, give the love....

2009-02-09T14:30:00.000-08:00

February is love month. Many a October/November births will be made this month! :)

When I had my first 2 children in 1990 and in 1997, the process of caring for a newborn still included warnings about "spoiling" a baby. I have since done my research and realized that this is not possible. During the newborn phase, you are all that your baby knows. Transition to the world is not easy. If you've ever moved to a new city or state, or even a new neighborhood, remember how long it took to "get used" to your new environment. Your baby feels the same way.

Many a mom becomes overwhelmed when babies enter this transition phase. I hear many things like, "The baby will only sleep if he is being held." or "Unless I'm holding her or nursing her, she is crying." The babies on the commercials who sit in swings and bouncy seats cooing and watching their mom from afar are adopted alien babies! Your baby may do this when they are a little older, but not as a wee one.

Enter babywearing. Babywearing is strongly supported by the Attachment Parenting community. See a link from Dr. Sears: http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/T130300.asp
Babywearing enables you to keep your baby close and secure while having 2 hands free! It produces a bond and a feeling of security for your baby. A more secure baby will usually equate to a less fussy baby. There are many different ways to wear your baby. Check out this site for an overview and parent reviews: http://www.thebabywearer.com/

My son is over a year old and I still wear him around the house. I don't know how I would get anything done if I didn't. I tell people my humorous story of having to take my older son to the doctor with baby in tow. I enjoyed tucking Jude into the sling(he was about 4 months old at the time) and keeping him unexposed to all the sick kids running around the waiting room. Upon leaving, I really needed to use the restroom. Thanks to my sling, I could use the restroom without having to worry about where to put the baby, or guiding a giant stroller into a small space. LOL It seems funny but at the moment, I couldn't have been more grateful for that sling!

For more information on babywearing and attachment parenting, see these websites:

http://www.kellymom.com/parenting/sling.html

http://babywearinginternational.org/

http://www.babycenter.com/2_baby-wearing-how-carriers-help-you-and-your-baby_1486841.bc

Let your baby be your most beautiful accessory!

A doula looks forward to a new year........

2009-01-10T12:59:00.000-08:00

Being a doula means being in a constant state of learning. Every birth is different. Every woman is different. Just when you think you know something, you realize that there is so much more to learn.

This year, I plan to begin attending births as an apprentice with my midwife, in addition to continuing my doula practice. I am excited about this new chapter in my life. I want to serve the women in my community. This will mean more reading and studying.....which also means prioritizing my life.

Some wonder why I would choose such a path when Certified Professional Midwives are not legally recognized in NC. The answer is simple - someone has to do it. Right now, in the Charlotte area, the options for homebirth are limited to a few midwives who shoulder the load of this homebirth community. As the homebirth movement grows, so does the demand for qualified, competent midwives. Women deserve options. Women need options. I have a passion to give those options to them.

What does this mean for my doula practice? I don't intend to practice any differently. I will still continue to support women in the hospital setting. Standing for choice means I believe that a woman should be able to give birth in the place of her choosing, with the practitioner of her choosing.

I hope that somehow, in 2009, I can inspire women to embrace all of their choices. The only way the birth climate will ever change is if women refuse to allow it to remain as it is.......practitioner oriented. Women must demand that their needs be of the utmost importance, rather than the needs of the insurance company or a malpractice policy. I believe that this day is coming. I hope it is soon.

Energy surrounds you....

2008-12-08T05:03:00.000-08:00

There is something about the energy in a pregnant woman's body. Many people call it a "glow." It is an intense and incredible responsibility to provide shelter for another life and then to bring it into the world. Everywhere the laboring mother puts her feet becomes sacred ground, from the bathroom to the hallway.

It doesn't take much to disrupt this energy flow. You hear countless stories of women in active labor who get to the hospital and suddenly everything stops, or contractions slow down significantly. It's a powerful force and one that is best left to progress on it's own.

This is why it is so important to give great consideration to who is allowed to visit and attend you while you are in labor. Everyone who comes in contact with you needs to be on the same page as you are. If your desire is an unmedicated birth, a well meaning friend stopping by and saying, "I don't know why you are choosing to be miserable!" is not encouraging your process. The woman in labor is vulnerable and her words may very well ring in your brain later when you are facing your most difficult contractions. You may temporarily doubt your own choices.

In her book, Spiritual Midwifery, Ina May Gaskin has this to say about it: "The birthing energy flows smoothest when everyone present is part of the crew, helping the baby to its birth. If some of the other people present are spectators, or what we call "passengers," the birth can be slowed down by hours or can even be halted until some change takes place in the energy. This is because anyone whose presence is not an actual help is requiring the emotional support that should be going to the mother."

Talk to your labor attendant about how to handle keeping your birth space sacred in the home and in the hospital. Incorporate some boundaries into your birth plan. Talk to your care provider about laboring at home as long as possible to avoid unnecessary people coming in and out of your space while you labor. It may feel selfish to you to allow only your husband to be in the room. But remember that you are ultimately creating an environment for your baby's birth, not just for yourself.

I recommend reading Ina Mays Guide to Childbirth if you want to find out more about birth energy. It contains wonderful birth stories and great information for the empowered woman.

The truth is out there.......

2008-10-10T14:42:00.000-07:00

I encourage everyone who is having a baby, thinking about having a baby, or knows someone who is having or thinking of having a baby(did I get everyone?) to watch The Business of Being Born. This is a very provocative documentary that has caused quite a stir in the medical and natural birth community. It is factual, moving and inspiring. As a woman, if you ever doubted your ability to birth, this movie will revive your confidence.

http://www.thebusinessofbeingborn.com/

You can also take this great quiz to see how many of these "facts" that have probably been shared with you by someone are true or false.....

http://www.consumerreports.org/health/medical-conditions-treatments/pregnancy-childbirth/maternity-care/maternity-care-quiz/maternity-care-quiz.htm

On being BOLD....

2008-09-08T14:39:00.000-07:00

I saw the BOLD play TWICE this weekend....and loved it both times. I laughed and cried. I don't think there was a woman in the theatre that couldn't identify in some way with one or more of the characters. The message of the play was this: Women deserve birth on their terms.

The play was about women....real women's stories of birth. Some of the stories were joyous and some were filled with regret. Some were hilarious and some were deeply moving. I have heard those stories represented among my friends. So many, including myself in my second birth, went in with an expectation and came home wondering, "what happened?" Somewhere along the way, we felt that we lost control of our birth and we agreed to interventions or procedures that we weren't sure of. Labor is such a vulnerable place. For a woman to try to make an informed decision between 75 second contractions is nearly impossible. Aren't we taught to never make major decisions under stress?

I hope as a doula to be there during these moments to help mom and partner feel less pressured and more informed. I want to be sure that a mom in my care can walk away knowing that every decision she made was the right decision for her.

Birth is normal and natural. Most moms know instinctually what to do and a good birth attendant will encourage those instincts. Labor doesn't have a time limit and babies don't follow schedules. Not every labor will follow the "roadmap" that the books talk about. It's ok.

Women deserve to be heard. Women deserve good support. And yes, women deserve birth on their terms.

The importance of self care.....

2008-08-28T14:21:00.000-07:00

Becoming a doula means changing some things within yourself, if needed. As a doula, you take on the role of caring for others. But in that role, you realize that caring for yourself is necessary.

I have found lately that I honor my body with naps when it is possible and I feel that I need them. I found this to be of great benefit when I attended a very long labor last week(congrats Mike and Paula!) There will inevitably be nights when I miss an entire nights sleep, so it is important to take care of myself physically through nutrition, exercise and rest.

In other words, in becoming a doula, I realize more than ever that I must practice what I preach. When I tell expecting and new moms to take care of themselves, I remember that I must set the example. Because truly, if I do not give myself the benefit of self-care, then it is impossible to give energy and help to another without becoming depleted.

Expecting moms who have other children must be especially mindful of this. Even if it means napping WITH your younger ones, take that time for yourself. The housework will wait. And especially right after having a baby, you must resist that urge to "be productive" while the baby is sleeping and get some rest yourself. It is vital to your physical and emotional health. Many moms have fallen unexpectedly into post partum blues because of overdoing. During pregnancy is the time to begin the habit of self care....warm bubble baths, naps, sitting down with a good book, taking a prenatal yoga class.

Mothers are givers, but no one can give from a place that is empty. Fill your bank with some self pampering, healthy eating, adequate rest and moderate exercise and you'll have some extra energy to make it through those sleep-deprived nights.

Birth Withdrawl

2008-08-08T17:52:00.001-07:00

So after a couple of births, I feel like I'm in withdrawl. It's been a couple of weeks and someone needs to have a baby in my presence! I just love the birth process.

I have met a few of the Charlotte doulas(http://www.charlottedoulas.org/) and feel that our area is so blessed to have so many women comitted to the cause of journeying with women through their birth process. This area is highly technological and we score high in using lots of interventions in labor and birth. Hopefully, this little group of women can make a big difference in women's birth choices in Charlotte and surrounding.

Rock on doula friends.......

2008-07-26T11:16:00.001-07:00

I attended the ICAN meeting today and am so excited about their presence here in Charlotte where it is so desperately needed. So many c-sections and so many women who aren't happy with their experiences. Women who feel traumatized by the surgical removal of their baby are not given permission to feel angry, cheated or even to grieve. Well meaning people say, "At least you have a healthy baby" and you feel even worse for being ungrateful on top of everything else.

Their(my) feelings are valid and important. I deserve to be heard and to be allowed to have whatever emotions spring up my from my experience. My failure to progress(common reason for c-section) made me feel like a failure as a mother. Not everyone can understand that. I am not crazy or oversensitive. I am not anti-doctor or anti-establishment. C-sections have saved the lives of mothers and babies and thank God for them. But lives are not always at stake.

I AM PRO WOMAN. Women have a right to accrurate information about C-sections and VBAC and yes, inductions. They have a right to make an informed choice. No one should look back and say, "I wish I would have known......" or "I didn't realize the statistics were in my favor"

VBAC in Charlotte is a challenge, but it shouldn't be. This needs to change.

I have a website

2008-07-24T17:09:00.000-07:00

I have a website, I'm on myspace and I'm on facebook. I am now what I consider to be "up to speed." I have had two births. They were incredible. It's amazing what you learn about yourself during someone else's birth. You learn to be patient. You cannot rush nature, no matter how hard you try. Even Pitocin(the synthetic drug used to start labor) cannot always do what mother nature demands. But the beauty is waiting and watching a baby and a mother be born. And for me, a doula is being born.

Here I am at: http://www.artfullyborn.com/

But I'll still be here, chatting and rambling......

Introducing......ME!

2008-06-01T08:23:00.000-07:00

Everyone needs a website, but it just isn't me! Well, maybe it will be someday. But for now, this is the way I LOVE to communicate and express myself to others. I admit, I don't know much about HTML codes and such, but I know how to introduce myself here! I am Meliea....some call me Mel when they get to know me....it's easier to pronounce. I consider myself an artist, enjoying all things writing. This blog is about my becoming a birth doula. A birth doula is somewhat an artist also. Dictionary.com defines art as: the quality, production, expression, or realm, according to aesthetic principles, of what is beautiful, appealing, or of more than ordinary significance. What a perfect description of what I wanted my births to be! A birth doula simply helps mom and dad/partner(or in the case of the single mom...just mom) paint that picture.

After the birth of my last child, I realized....I MISS BIRTH! I loved the energy of birth and the women who helped me(my midwife and her assitant). I will tell that birth story soon!

So for now, I live in charlotte with my blended family: Hubby, J, as I call him. My 17yo daughter graduates from high school in 2 weeks. I have a 10yo son who I call my "artistic autistic" as he navigates his way through Asperger's syndrome. Stuck in the middle is my 8yo stepson , who is still getting to know me and I'm confident will decide that he likes me....someday....LOL. And then, there is the baby...my 10month old, mine and J's masterpiece together.

Birth has changed through the years. There have been some great medical advances! An internet friend of mine gave birth at 24 weeks and that baby just turned 1!! Amazing. However, some of those advances have created great fear and more of a sense of "what can go wrong" instead of creating a positive view of birth. A normal, healthy pregnancy will result in the wondrous and natural process of birth without much intervention. However, we bring into the process all of our fears, perceived inadequacies, trust issues and of course, the memory of all the horror stories our friends have told us during our pregnancy.

I see my role as a doula to be whatever YOU need it to be. All things from encouraging you that you can do this, to just rubbing your back so that your husband/partner can look into your eyes and give you reassurance. Of course, along the way, I will help you find positions for labor to ease your discomfort as much as possible. I will make sure that you fully understand everything the medical staff is telling you. I will offer emotional support and positive energy for you to fall on when the going gets tough.

So that's me! Check out my links and see if having a doula at your birth is right for you.

My contact information appears(or should shortly) on Charlottedoulas.org